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Hotaru

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Hotaru

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It has been a long time since I have written anything in as evident of the 7 years gap. I did get married and things were good for a while. But like with anything, sometimes its not meant to last. I separated from him last year in June and was so set on divorce. Only reason I hadn’t filed was that I did have the money for the filing fee. Now with time and the separation I am at a loss. I miss him so much and yet I was so unhappy with him for the last two years. People change, I changed and he didn't change with me. I'm so confused since I was so set on the divorce. The question that I am now struggling to answer is, if I filed then, would I still feel the same as I do now? Maybe its because I now know the taste of loneliness that I am feeling this way. I do love him and yet I know that what I have done is irrevocable and now I have to live with it. I don’t know, maybe I’m feeling this way because the realization is setting in or maybe I have too many people telling what a mistake I’m making. I don’t know. I was so sure once and now I don’t know.
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